Sunday, May 2, 2010

I really, really hate Step Brothers

Why do I decide to always travel long distances by bus? Its not like airfare isn't cheap in Europe. For three weekends in a row I've taken bus rides that were far too long. At first, this was exciting. I liked to look out the windows and see the alps and pretty vineyards. After spending a good portion of my life cooped up on buses, I'm over it. When I went to Munich it took me about eight hours on the bus. When I went to Nice it took me about seven hours. Prague, though, was on a whole new level. Thirteen long hours I sat on that Goddamned bus. Twice. I suffered through the first bus ride breathing nothing but recycled fart air stuffed into a seat behind the loudest snorer in the world (who also happened to be the tiniest girl in the world) while the back of my seat was constantly jostled by an inconsiderate bitch who I'm pretty sure was the farter. The second bus ride wasn't nearly as bad, save for one thing: Step Brothers.

I get it. Step Brothers is a great movie to put on for people stuck on a bus. Its funny and long and everyone laughs until the time passes. Yeah. I watched Step Brothers on every single one of the aforementioned bus journeys. Its like all the bus driver's got together and chose Step Brothers as their signature bus ride movie. The first time I watched it, it did it's job. Time passed, I laughed, etc. etc. Then the next weekend came and the movie came on again. I would have read a book and tuned it out accept in Italy the buses don't have personal lights. So I watched the stupid movie again. Prague was the worst though. Thirteen long hours of movie watching; it was inevitable that I would watch Step Brothers. I was annoyed, sure, but I steeled myself for it. What I wasn't prepared for was the movie collection running out. Not only did I watch Step Brothers on the way TO Prague, I watched it on the way FROM Prague.

If I see Will Ferrel's nuts one more time I think I'm going to gouge my eyes out.
Arrivederci, for now.

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